Grace Unveiled 2

GREATNESS

2009-09-16T19:02:00.000-07:00

A site that is greatness ... and I mean it!!

www.cakewrecks.blogspot.com

Anytime you need a break and a good laugh head here ... just make sure you're not eating. I've choked several times.

Things I've learned about Sadie ...

2009-09-16T18:26:00.001-07:00

1. She comes running, eager and expectant, anytime you say her name. She's just waiting to be called.
2. She is content with little and savors much.
3. She barks to let you know she's there. Otherwise, no barking.
4. She has a grandma spirit that i think sees a lot.
5. When she stares straight at the SAME corner in our living room I really wonder if she is looking at an angel. She is transfixed, and it is always in the same place that she is looking (she's doing it right now, and then looking at me, and then looking back ... hmmm.... )
6. She likes to go outside to see what's happenin' and then wants to come back in to be with us - the ones she loves most.
7. She gets scared and hides under whatever she can find.
8. She wants to be good but sometimes she's just not.
9. She loves babies and kids and feels proud when she's sweet to them.
10. She loves to play and will be completely ridiculous until you join her in the game. Even though we don't always join, she still tries with the same amount of zeal and hope.
11. She is not one to turn away affection, and actually encourages for as much as she can get. And most of the time, gets extra.

Our Dades ... we love her (crizap and all.)

Also, we are finding she is very much like us ... just fully in the open about it.

Coming to a close ...

2009-09-13T17:14:00.000-07:00

Facebook Fast over in 5 days! WOOOOOOOOO!

Facebook Fast ... and furious

2009-09-06T20:57:00.000-07:00

Okay, not furious, but I've been fasting from Facebook for a good three weeks now and tonight is the HARDEST it's been not to get on there... Could it be that I'm just relaxing at home, Labor Day is over, and it would be fun to peruse pictures and comments and such? Could it also be that something monumental is happening on there?! I do wonder, but I SHAN'T go.

I thought maybe blogging about really wanting to get on there would help. We'll see if it does.

Happy Labor Day to all! :O)

Open wide my heart!

2009-09-03T17:13:00.000-07:00

It's pretty amazing when we actually live the way that our heart responds... beautiful, actually!

I am so thankful for my job, for the opportunities God is giving me to be me and I find myself coming alive again ... deeply alive. Singing in the morning, laughing alone in the kitchen while I pour my coffee *GASP!!* I'm falling in love with God, again!!

Oh my gosh, I hadn't realized that until JUST now, but in sharing how I'm feeling I remember that two/three weeks ago I told Him that I wanted to fall in love with Him again and He is doing it!! How is He doing it?? By me starting to live in the way I was created to live, my soul is responding and singing!! LOVE IT!

Case in point of me feeling very 'me' ... Tuesday I was in the office and I rounded the corner and pointed at my cube-mate, very broadway like, singing, "Jimmy crack corn and I don't care, " ... and when I went to the second line I was going to add the big ol' broadway kick - not the chorus line kick but the sassy knee first then toe slap, "Jimmy crack corn, and I don't care!" And on the 'care' I did the slap kick and my shoe flew OFF my foot like a stinking missile, SHOOTING across the office and slamming into the opposite wall! Narrowly, like inches, missing cube-mate's face by the way. I stopped, *scream!* and then we just laughed and laughed!!!

I'm pretty confident I heard God laughing too :O)

love to you all ... I pray you are living in who you were created to be. We are His workmanship, made on purpose - every piece. As we grow/remain committed to being who we are, we will find that life inside of Him.

Thank you, Lord!

A desert on the mend

2009-08-22T19:02:00.000-07:00

You know what, I am truly deeply in love with the Lord ... and it is nothing of my own doing. That's for dang sure.

I was just in the kitchen fixing myself a couple little hors' dourves (if I spelled that right I should give MYSELF 10 dollars) and as I was putting the finishing touches on, I was thinking of the conversation I had had with the Lord earlier ... really, the begging.

"GOD!! Why is it so easy to feel you and to talk to you and to hear from you when I am in community or with other people, but when it's just been you and me lately I feel so dry! Like you aren't there!! I hate that Lord and I don't want that type of relationship with You!! Please help me! Please show me what scripture to read .. i really want to hear You and I ask that Your Word would come alive to me. PLEASE speak to me as you desire" And John 7 came to mind, so I went on faith and I was reading about Jesus, which really does my heart good to read about my best friend and the life He lived. It goes to about the middle of the chapter where it talks about him being the spring of life. Specifically verse 37 and 38 say, "Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, "If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him." This afternoon I just started crying because I haven't been feeling that way. When I am with OTHERS talking about God or even to Him I have, but what about just me and You, Lord?

This evening, as I was wrapping up making my crackers, turkey, swiss and dill relish (my hors' douvres ;) ), I was thinking back to that, "Father, I really don't feel the streams of living water and that's what I long for. I want to live in that place. I know You promise it, but I haven't been feeling it when it's just me and You" And as I was walking from the kitchen back to the office, He did it. All of the sudden gratefulness flooded my heart such that I forgot I had JUST uttered that prayer ... I was just walking through my house, and was suddenly so thankful for His provision of a sweet dog, a wonderful home, food to eat, an evening to relax and then I heard them, no FELT them, trinkling through my soul. Living Water.

The Lord just reminded me of something else that He's been talking to me about this week: He inhabits the praise of His people so it makes COMPLETE sense that I would feel Him as I praised and thanked Him!! GEEZ!!! You are SOO good! You CAUSED my thankful heart and then you INHABITED it!! You are so wild, Father! (you can read about this in Psalm 22, I'm heading there in just a sec)

Just now when I went to grab the verses above in John 7 I saw again the ones that follow: "By this he meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were later to receive." I BELIEVE!! And He is HERE!!! Hallelujah! Or, Praise the Lord!!!

I am SO thankful the Spirit is inside of me, guiding me to praise and as a result, the Lord is here with me!!! Does He set us up to win or what??!?!

You truly blow my mind, Lord. You are more than ANYTHING I can understand, but I accept you SO thankfully, so thankfully.

ADDENDUM: I just went and looked at Psalm 22 and the word 'enthroned' is commonly used. Which in the original writing means: to dwell, remain, sit, abide
(Qal)
to sit, sit down
to be set
to remain, stay
to dwell, have one's abode
(Niphal) to be inhabited
(Piel) to set, place
(Hiphil)
to cause to sit
to cause to abide, set
to cause to dwell
to cause (cities) to be inhabited
to marry (give an dwelling to)
(Hophal)
to be inhabited
to make to dwell

Christmas in September? Sounds GREAT to me!

2009-08-18T07:09:00.000-07:00

I know it's been a while, but here I am again.

I am REALLY feeling a desire for fall and the Christmas season. So much so that I jokingly told a friend last week that I want to decorate for Christmas in September, have our Christmas Party in October and then just enjoy November and December of other people's events and parties all while sitting in twinkling lights and candles at home.

At first I thought I was just kidding, but now I don't know that I am! Even sitting here now I'm longing for hot chocolate and fleece pajamas, holiday scented candles and twinkling lights. I don't have any plans this weekend, other than continuing to prepare for my garden, so I may just find myself stringing up the lights :O)

Realistically I'll wait til September, but ONLY just maybe. Especially since a lot of the post Christmas extreme clearance decor I purchased is fall colors.

Who am I kidding ... I don't think I can wait.

Have a twinkly day!

Simply Pray

2009-05-21T09:25:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone! I know it's been a LONG time since my last post, but God has been up to absolutely wild and incredible things which have left me with zero time to share!

One of the "bigs" I would love to share with you is the video below :O) It is a session God let me share at a Women's Retreat and then again two weeks later ... What He did was like nothing He had done in our relationship before I wanted to share that with you :O) Also, if you came to one of these sessions, I would LOVE to get your feedback and hear how it's going for you. The video is at this link:
http://blip.tv/file/2140021

I am no professional AT ALL so this video was made by someone sweet enough to record it and then another wonderful friend uploaded it for me :O) YAY FOR FRIENDS!!!!!

If after you watch the video (note AFTER ;) ) you want to read the notes I wrote to sum this up they are below, but PLEASE watch the video first and respond as God leads you through the session. Let HIM lead your time ... not me.

Love love to you all :O)
Anna

Lectio Divina: Divine Conversation, the Embrace of God
1 Lectio: Prayerful, slow, heart-centered reading of a sacred text.
a. This is the most crucial step … centering your heart to hear what God wants to talk to you about. Before you open the Bible, be honest with God. Talk to Him about how you are feeling, what you are thinking. Lay it all out - completely honest. THEN ask Him to line your heart up with His. This gives Him complete freedom to talk to you as He desires.
b. “How do I choose what to read?” Honestly, it doesn’t matter what passage of the Bible you read. You are asking God to speak to you and He will regardless of where you are in the Bible. He may not speak to you about what you are asking Him, but He will speak to you about what you need to hear first. He really does know your needs better than you do. Trust Him with the timing of His answer. If you feel you want to explore a certain book of the Bible, go for it. If you want to look at a certain subject go to the back of your Bible and look in the index for that topic – choose a passage from the list that is there. OR go to Biblegateway.com and enter that word. From there a list will pull up of every time that word is mentioned in the bible. From there just choose the verse you want to look at. There is no right or wrong here. If you do choose a verse this way, be sure to read the two to three verses before and after that verse to get the idea of what the passage says. You never want to take a verse by itself because it may misconstrue the actual meaning.
c. “How long should the passage be?” Less is more. I wouldn’t read more than one chapter at a sitting. If you started reading and feel especially impacted read the next few verses to finish that thought and then stay with that section of verses. You definitely do not need to read an entire chapter.

2 Meditatio: Deliberate pondering of the message in the text.
a. Read the entire passage.
b. Read the passage again and write down everything it says about God. This includes Lord, Father, Son, Holy Spirit, God, I AM.
c. Read the passage a third time and write down anything that causes any kind of an emotional response.

3 Oratio: Responding to God’s message with honest, sincere prayer.
a. Talk to God about what you have just written, specifically the things that caused any kind of an emotional response. That is something the Lord wants to talk to you about! i. Example: If I wrote down, “God is just” and it impacted me emotionally in a positive way I would say something along the lines of, “Lord, I LOVE that you are just! It is so good and comforting and sweet to me to know that you WILL take care of things! I can let go and trust that justice WILL be done!” and if there is a specific thing I’m talking about like an injustice you have experienced, something you’ve heard about, etc elaborate specifically with the Lord. If it impacted me in a negative way I would say, “Lord, this says you are just but in … situation I haven’t seen this!!! Please please please be true to your Word and help me to trust you that you WILL be. Thank you that you ARE just and I can trust that you ARE working things out and I don’t have to be the one to do it. I can trust that you WILL work it out! Please show me if you want me to have any part in this. And as I trust you please flood me with your peace about the situation.”

4 Contemplatio: Allowing the prayer to dissolve into wordless, thoughtless contemplation, or simply resting in the Divine presence. The embrace of God.
a. If your time with God was:
i. Sweet - soak it in!!! Sit there and enjoy it with Him!! He longs for you to and it feels so good to do that!
ii. Painful - in that God pointed out some stuff in your life and it stung - Please let me remind you that there is NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:18). That means that if you have turned your heart to God, through Jesus Christ, the rest of our lives is about the Lord helping us become exactly who He created us to be and it is GLORIOUS!!! The Lord disciplines the one He loves (Hebrews 12:6) so sometimes our time with Him will be about Him pointing out things in us that aren’t according to what He desires for us and that may really sting, but it is for our GOOD. If it seems hard to remember His love in that moment, just remember that God loved you so much that He sent His only son so that you may know Him. That is no small thing. (John 16)
iii. Confusing - that is okay. Please continue to sit with Him until you feel released to go. You are truly sitting in the presence of God … linger. Even if you didn’t receive a ‘direct, clear word’ from Him be encouraged! The Lord says that His word NEVER returns empty/meaningless (Isaiah 55:11)! Ever! So even if it wasn’t for ‘this time’ trust that there was a reason you learned this today. The Lord WILL use the Word He just wrote on your heart.

My final “Lectio Divina” encouragement: Give God your active “Yes!” Whether it is in being obedient to what you have read in the Bible, or in being obedient to what you feel God is prompting you to do … when you give Him the freedom to shape your heart and your life He will do ABSOLUTELY wild things! I pray you saw just a glimpse of that in our time together. I did absolutely nothing and could have done nothing to plan any of what God has done with this session. Every single piece of it was simply me saying “Yes” to Him and trusting Him whatever that meant … it has been GLORIOUS!! Scary? Yes! But ultimately AMAZING and I would have missed it if I hadn’t given Him my “yes” and kept giving it as He gave me opportunity.

I beg you and encourage you to do the same. One of my favorites is in the book of Mark where there was a father who asked Jesus to heal his son. Jesus asked the father if he believed he could heal the son and the father very honestly said, “I believe. Please help overcome my unbelief.” It is very honest and okay to say that to the Lord as we grow in our relationship with Him. He knows it can be scary and just because you are scared doesn’t mean you are wrong. Be honest with your doubts and fears, and then choose to trust Him and do as He is prompting anyway. As you give Him your active “yes” He will do things in you and through you that you would have never imagined! (Ephesians 3:20)

Love, love, love to you. Anna

YOU are good.

2009-04-24T06:53:00.000-07:00

Just enjoying the presence of my Father, King, Glory, Hope, Redeemer, Love, Jesus ... I wish words weren't so limited. I cannot do justice to the swelling and gratefulness in my heart.

He disciplines those He loves. He pursues those who have strayed. He RUNS to those returning.

He is SO good. "Good" is such an all encompassing word that seems so small but is fully perfect for the Lord.

"Good" obviously the Lord loves this word, it is in the Bible 562 times :O) I love what Jesus says about "good" "Now behold, one came and said to Him, 'Good Teacher, what good thing shall I do that I may have eternal life?' So He said to him, 'Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God.; " (Matthew 19:16-17).

The root of good:
of good constitution or nature
useful, salutary
good, pleasant, agreeable, joyful, happy
excellent, distinguished
upright, honourable

I like it :)

Sweet Replenishing.

2009-03-16T07:27:00.000-07:00

It has been a VERY wearing last month or so ... a lot of GREAT great things going on, but they left me pulling from the last drop of myself. Actually, I think that drop was gone given that I couldn't get out of bed two Mondays ago. I had nothing.

God is WILD in His goodness. When we cry out to Him in honesty He is QUICK to do His thing. Thank you, Father! He has been working and replenishing for the past two weeks and it has been so sweet. If you have 20 minutes, and really this is WORTH you taking 20 minutes, you should really check out this sermon:

http://www.oneplace.com/common/player/oneplace/CustomPlayer.asp?bcd=3/12/2009&url=mms://wm.salemweb.net/a3186/o29/oneplace/wm/et/et20090312.wma&MinTitle=Enduring+Truth&MinURL=http://www.oneplace.comhttp://www.oneplace.com/ministries/enduring_truth/&MinArchives=http://www.oneplace.comhttp://www.oneplace.com/ministries/enduring_truth/archives.asp&Refresh=&AdsCategory=MINISTRY.ET&Show_ID=367
Here are some pics of His sweet replenishing. Lord, you are GOOD! (I have a more complete album up on Facebook, but this is pretty good too :O) )

OH! And if someone can throw me a bone on a better way to upload photos that would be GREAT!!! This always uploads them in reverse order, so, the pics below are from newest to oldest (very unfortunately, but I don't have time to straighten this out). Love you ALL!

My husband, knowing my heart of hearts, suggested that we grab some fun colors and do my hair this weekend... apparently I've married a man who can do ANYTHING because he did A FABULOUS job!!! Thanks, love!!! :)

I was craving a burger and Fuddrucker's delivered. I gasped OUT loud when I opened this box. This burger was NO joke!!! (And DELISH!!)

Ryan took me on a San Antonion Riverwalk Getaway last weekend ... this was San Antonio's parting gift to us ...

I almost moved to San Antonio last weekend for THIS park! ...

My love :O) Heading to the Riverwalk ... (also, note what my hair USED to look like :O) )

TASHA!!!! I was really 'done' with nothing more to give a couple of weeks ago and she called me on Thursday night asking if I was up for a surprise. I said, "YES!!! Please!!!" and she took me HORSBACKRIDING!! I had never really been before... what a WONDERFUL friend! i love you, Tasha!!!!!

That's "it" friends... Soaking in the literal grace and filling of the Lord> He is doing it Himself and using His people. I am learning to 'do' balance in a new way and it is GOOD.

Now, back to my yummy breakfast ...

A Romans 8 Groaning

2009-02-17T06:14:00.000-08:00

There are no pictures below so I wonder how many people will read this... I do the same thing. No pics? Less likely to read, BUT, I just read this article and it only affirms and HUGELY resounds in me regarding what I feel God has been talking to me about A LOT!!! ... A groaning just WELLED UP in me throughout my reading this.

Lord, please show us what you would have US do ... more specifically, me, Lord. What is MY role in this?

Awaken Us, O God!
Peter Beck
Professor, Writer
January 12, 2009

One of the great things about studying history is that God brings to our remembrance the mighty and wonderful things he has done in the past.

Did you know that a number of great revivals have swept across our nation over the years? Jonathan Edwards, pastor of a small frontier town in Massachusetts in the 1730s, witnessed a great work of God in which 300 believers were added to his church in six months. For 25 straight years at the beginning of the 1800s revivals flared all across the nation. During the Civil War over 250,000 soldiers, Union and Confederate, made professions of faith.

However, studying history also reveals our shortcomings. Did you know that there’s not been a great season of continual revival in America for over 100 years?

How can we explain that? It’s simple. Just as in the days before Israel’s exile, God’s people in America have turned their back on their Creator. Oh sure, there’s more churches today than at any point in our history. Yes, there are churches bursting at the seams with people. But, on the whole, churches in America have lost their way. They’ve forgotten their first love. They’ve grown old. They’ve grown cold. They’re now dead.

What we need is a great revival--not amongst the lost but among those who claim to have been found.

William Sprague, a witness to the revivals of the Second Great Awakening, said that “the efficiency of the church depends greatly on its purity.” He wasn’t talking about the smooth operation of the church. He was talking about the church’s ability to fulfill its God-given role, that of calling a lost and dying world to the Savior. He recognized that the church was sick, that it was cancerous, and that it was dying from the inside out.

The cause? Sin.

A church that harbors and tolerates sin of any kind is a church that no longer savors of the sweet smell of forgiveness. Instead, it reeks of spiritual death. Rather than living as their Lord lived, rather than living as the world should live, they live as the world lives. There’s no longer a significant difference between the people of the church and the people of the world. Is it any wonder that our children and grandchildren see no use for the church? They see a Christianity that doesn’t really matter. They see a Christianity that doesn’t make a difference. And, they see no use for it.

Baptist preacher Vance Havner once said, “A revival is the church remembering, the church repenting, the church repeating.”

We as a church must remember all that God has done for us and all that He has commanded us. We must repent of our individual and collective sins. We must return to our first love, sharing our faith, raising our voices in praise, and once again living lives worthy of a people called to bear His wonderful name.

We must look into our hearts, we must search our souls, and we must prepare our church. After all, the stakes are high. At risk is not just the reputation and future of our church. The reputation of Jesus Christ, His sacrifice, and His church are on the line.

Join me, even now, praying that God will work a miracle of awakening among us and bring great glory to Himself.

Peter Beck (Ph.D. Southern Seminary) is assistant professor of religion at Charleston Southern University in Charleston, South Carolina and a former Senior Pastor.

Good stuff.

2009-02-14T11:44:00.001-08:00

The healing of the soul begins by restoring the glory of God to it's flaming all-attracting place at the center. ~ John Piper

Jesus is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of His nature. ~Hebrews 1:3

And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. ~2 Corinthians 3:18

Grow. Grow strong. Stand tall. Yours is a valued treasure. ~Max Lucado

The Bible: Well, I struggle with it.

2009-02-05T05:23:00.000-08:00

Soooo, I don't know how reading the Bible is for you ... dry, boring, exciting, interesting, dumbfounding? ... I think it has been ALL of those for me at different times, and in emailing a friend about it this morning, I wanted to put some stuff out there that has REALLY helped TRULY make the Bible come alive for me... Make me WANT to get in it, read it and DIG IN to what things really mean. SO, if you're interested, keep reading. These are the things that have ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS worked for me (even if you and I are completely different, it can't hurt to try it once or twice :O) ).

Getting Started
If you're new to reading the Bible and don't really know "how" or even if you've been reading for YEARS, I want to share what helps me HUGELY and really, really helps me connect EVERY TIME I open the Bible. When I do this process, it is always really rich:

Before you open the Bible, pray and ask God to open your mind and heart to hear anything that He has for you. I PROMISE there is MUCH He wants you to know and asking Him to speak to us before we open up the Bible really helps to quiet our hearts to hear from Him. This may sound weird and new to you, but again, it can't hurt to try :O)
Once you have prayed, read through the verse/passage in front of you and write down the things it says about God.
Soak that in. What do those things say about God ... really think about it. If there is a specific thing that impacts you, sit and talk to God about that... speak/write OPENLY as you would a GREAT friend... if it doesn't make sense/is hard to reconcile, TALK to Him about it. If you LOVE it and wonder if it's too good to be true, TALK to Him about it... if you just want to CELEBRATE that THAT is part of who God is... do that!!! There is no 'time limit' on this... you just keep engaging with Him as much or as little as you want.
Then, in that same passage, write down the words/phrases that impact you. Once you've identified them, you are going to do the same thing. Talk to God about why they impact you. It REALLY helps me to do that through writing because it helps me stay focused.
And that is IT. It really IS that easy!!! Sometimes I read something about God and can't get past that because I am so impacted by it, sometimes I whiz right on through and take a little something with me. Either way, there is no 'rule' to this, it is just to help really engage my heart with what I am reading.

Also, when you come to the Bible, come with an EXPECTANT heart... EXPECT to read something that really impacts you! LOOK for it!

Okay, Digging Deeper:
Crosswalk.com is the website I use to REALLY dig into scripture. If you want to dig even deeper, see what different people in history have to say, see what the core meaning of the words are, check out this site... it is my FAVORITE and I'll tell you why. I'm going to use Jeremiah 29:10-14 as an example: http://bible.crosswalk.com/OnlineStudyBible/bible.cgi?new=1&word=Jeremiah+29%3A10-15&section=0&version=nsn&language=en

SO, as you do the "Getting Started" steps and certain words impact you, you go to the link above and can click on that word (if it's underlined in blue) and it will take you to the original meaning of that word. Since the Bible was written in Hebrew and Greek (I think Greek, but that doesn't sound right to me), a lot of times the English language isn't able to catch the DEPTH of the word.
Soooooooo,when you click on this link it will take you to the depth of meaning, like this with 'plans' ... if you click on the word it pulls up this page: http://bible.crosswalk.com/OnlineStudyBible/bible.cgi?new=1&word=Jeremiah+29%3A10-15&section=0&version=nsn&language=en Which really breaks down the word and you see even MORE of God's intentionality in that one of the meanings is 'design' ... that feels SO much more personal to even me. Be sure to go to that link, but there are SO many other words used there!
Anyhow, with SOME words there is an original Hebrew that the word came from... a root of the root if you will... and with 'plan' that is the case. At the page above that explains 'plan' deeper, look up and to the right and you will see "Word Origin from" with a number that is blue. That number represents the core, core, core of the word. If you click on THAT you find:http://bible.crosswalk.com/Lexicons/Hebrew/heb.cgi?number=2803&version=nas

And all of this is just with ONE word! I love, love, love doing 'wordstudies' on words that impact me/make me wonder, etc because once I dig deeper it gives me even more to talk to God about, gives greater impact in explaining the verse better, and can really resound with me more.

Okay, so that is JUST words.

Now, we're going to go back to the very first page: http://bible.crosswalk.com/OnlineStudyBible/bible.cgi?new=1&word=Jeremiah+29%3A10-15&section=0&version=nsn&language=en.

At this page you will find on the left all kinds of study options. I think you might REALLY be interested in commentaries. Commentaries (if you aren't familiar) are what people who have studied the Bible, the history of the time, etc, in depth have to say about the passage you are looking at.
Once you click on the word 'Commentaries' a slew of options come up. Ones I would recommend: Matthew Henry's, Wesley's Explanatory Notes (at the bottom of the page), and the Geneva StudyBible. The others I really don't know much about.
When you click on a commentator's name, you will then be able to see which books of the Bible they have made remarks about. Just click on the book you're interested in and you can read what all they have to say.

And that is really just the beginning of all of the tools you will find at Crosswalk! I LOVE THIS SITE! So, anyhow, let me know if you have any questions about anything, would like other suggestions, just whatever :O)

I really pray you have fun talking to God about this. That you enjoy this process!

I love the freedom we have in talking about everything with God, and especially about the Bible. To be honest and say, "This is GREAT!' or "God, I really struggle with this, I don't understand." and to ask Him for His guidance, to keep digging deeper, etc.

Soooooo, that's that. This is what I love, and, again, always makes me walk away glad I did it.

I hope you have FUN!!

Red letter, or really BOLD letter, day... or both?

2009-02-03T12:23:00.001-08:00

God changed my life today and it began with Psalm 139. I’m not even kidding. Now if I can just STAY in this!!! GUARD THIS TRUTH!

Let me just be honest and say that I’ve been very bored. Bored across the board. Heh. Seriously though, in our Small Group last week we started this new study and in it you write down ALLLLL of your “I wants.” The next step is to group them together and make a theme. The last step is to take your theme, which is your core desire, and ask the question “Why.” Like, “Why do I desire this?” until you get to the very, very core of what you desire and why it is you desire it.

I.E. I want to travel. Why? Because I like experiencing new people and new things. Why? Because it’s fun! Why? Because I’m created in the image of God and it seems that HE likes variety if He created it. *GASP!* That must mean it’s okay to have these desires!!!

And so it went and so it went… In the ‘final’ stepping back and looking at my core desires I realized I am BORED!

So, then we are in Staff Meeting this morning, and I had forgotten about the study and epiphany up above, we broke up into smaller groups and the first question they asked was, “What is most difficult for you in your current position?” My VERY first thought: I’m bored.

Is that WILD?! I hadn’t even thought about this or realized they were the same until I sat down to blog about the bored at work thing. The REASON I sat down to blog about it is because of what God has done in the 3 hours since I said it out loud.

So, backtracking to this morning, before the staff meeting, I had read Psalm 139 and was SO refreshed and invigorated and excited to be reminded of all of these things! “I see you, I know you, before you were born, etc, etc, etc”

Then, I go to staff meeting and declare, “I am bored.”

So, THEN, this is when God started really opening my eyes and doing His thing. My coworker is leaving staff and she shared something she’d journalled that she felt she needed to share with us. She began to quote the verse where God says, “I can do exceedingly abundantly more than all you could ask or imagine.” And she begins sharing how 1 year ago she had felt strongly called to a certain ministry and how God instead led her to this position where for the past year she has plotted and toiled. She shared how there is SO much that she learned, and could have only learned through this position, that prepared her for the steps that she would take now in this new life God is calling her to.

As she was saying all of this, it was all I could do not to start sobbing crying. I so LONG for that and I so FEEL like I’m in that ‘preparation’ time and just want to weep and cry and have my little tantrum. But what is WORSE:

I know, at least in part, why I am in my current job and I am not being faithful to those things. THAT was the Holy Spirit slap and it hurt and it was good.

Once I came to that, I felt like I needed to grab her and share how impacted I was and when I did, she said, “That’s really weird because I thought about you very specifically this morning… about your first day here.” And shared a bit more. I know who I was then and who I am being now and it only affirmed what God was saying, “Anna, you are not being faithful with where I have you and why I have you here.” But almost more than that, well not MORE, but yes, more. “I see you. I know your every thought. Your every desire. I know your words before you even speak them. I know how you are feeling. I am telling you I have a plan for you in this and it is more than all you could ask or imagine."

And you guys, He has only continued to AFFIRM that for the past few hours. Number 1, I feel LIFE… Holy Spirit continually being filled LIFE! Two, he has given me NUMEROUS opportunities, just since 11:30, to do the things I LOVE to do and be who I feel is ‘most me.’ THEN, to cap it ALL off, I was just asked to teach!!! One of my very core LOVES!!! MY GOSH, LORD! YOU ARE AMAZING!!!

It is like He needed to deal with my sin, and then confirm, “I know you. Be who you are where you are.”

OH my gosh, THAT’S been the big struggle. I don’t feel I’ve been faithful to be WHO I am WHERE I am and it is across the board. NO WONDER I’M BORED…. I HAVEN’T BEEN LIVING IN WHO I KNOW GOD HAS CREATED ME TO BE!

How can we ever LIVE if we aren’t growing in who God created us to be and living in what He has already shared with us? And this is REGARDLESS of circumstance. This is REGARDLESS of job, responsibilities, routines, relationships, whatever… Lord, how can I be who YOU have created me to be and who you DESIRE me to be in this situation? And am I STAYING connected to Him in that? Another verse from this morning’s staff meeting… “Do not be drunk on wine, but be filled by the Spirit.” Our pastor shared it is a CONTINUAL filling … a one stop shop won’t do it. We HAVE to stay connected to continue to be filled with Him.

OOOOHHHHH, man! Oh, Lord, THANK YOU! I NEEDED this!

In ‘closing’ I am remembering what a volunteer said today which, again, confirms what God is telling me and even builds on it. I had been feeling guilty about not being able to spend time with him and he said, “Anna, I do what I do for you because it brings me life. And it brings me life because I know that by setting up tables and chairs, which I really enjoy, you have more time to do what brings YOU to life!” His saying that was I felt the Lord continuing to confirm in me that we are ONE body and when we all walk in being who we were created to be, doing what He is leading us to do, it is BEAUTIFUL.

Please continue build this girl.

To the ends of the earth!

2009-01-26T18:04:00.000-08:00

Friday, Ryan calls at 11:51 a.m. "Hey babe! Wanna go to Padre?"
Me, "Today?"
Ryan, "Yes!"
Me, "COME GET ME!!"

We were packed and on the road by 1 p.m. ... YAY!! We LOVE spontenaety and I don't think we've been spontaneous in a while so this was GREAT!! Here are some pics :O)

On our way ... a beautiful drive :O)

Soooo, the reason we were able to get away is because Ryan's grandparents own this GREAT Texan Guest Ranch (http://www.texanguestranch.com/) where people come for extended stays, so they built a wing for family ... Thank you, Lord!! So, we stayed there, got to visit with his grandparents, and headed to Padre on Saturday.

Pic below, we are ALMOST to the beach and it was the coolest because we were driving to the end of the island and so there were HUGE sand dunes on both sides of the road... the wind was blowing the sand across the roads and it looked a lot like snow blowing acrosss. As we got closer and closer to the end of the island it honestly felt like the Pirates of the Carribbean where they sailed to the end of the earth... FUN! I knew we were going to the 'end' and that REALLY excited me!

Because it was so windy the wind formed these great sand formations with the shells, you can't really tell from the pics but it was soooo cool. We were just thinking, "God is SUCH an artist!! Even with sand on a beach, it forms a cool structure that makes me think of Him..."

Happy on the beach :O)

Soooo, after the beach we head to dinner at Blackbeard's and I'm telling Ryan this RIVETING story about how I pretty much got taken out by a 4 year old in the bathroom. Literally, I open the stall to leave and she physically bumrushes me trying to get to the toilet. Anyhow, in the midst of this story Ryan's eye begins to wander and I'm thinking, "What is he looking at?" So, he starts talking about what he's looking at and I'm thinking he's talking about this HUGE shipwrecked boat in front of the restaurant, but then realize he is not. He is talking about this car. (pic below)

Apparently a $300,000 car!! Can you even believe it?! So, I take Ryan's pic in front of it, you can see ANOTHER guy behind the car taking a picture and I walk away laughing about a male's unbelievable innate ability to smell a cool car. He was like, "What do you mean?" And I start telling him I thought he was talking about that huge shipwrecked boat and he says, only proving my point, "What boat???" LOL!! OOOHhhh, love it!

Anyhow, on the way home there was this gift shop that had the curbside appeal like NONE I have ever seen. If ever you've driven to South Padre you know what I am talking about. The thing behind me was a seashell. They had an entire scene of fish, corral, etc all along the side of the road that matched the size of this shell.

Apparently I love spontaneous and random ... according to the first week of MORPH that is exactly right on for me :O)

Hope you are all well :O)

The Sweetness of Reality

2009-01-15T06:56:00.000-08:00

A precious WONDERFUL friend of mine in her quirky honesty that I love SO much was dumbfounded about Paul and who he is and the way he writes...

Over Christmas I had asked several friends if they wanted to read through Philippians together and talk about it when Holiday Life is over. So we all got together last night and she so honestly, and kindly announced, "Being a new Christian, can I just be honest and say I don't get this guy?!" OOOOHHHH I love her and her honesty and her QUESTIONS!!! They are so great!

Essentially she was really struggling with/wrestling with Paul ... the way he writes, the fact that he wrote so often and sounded so self centered and I just said, "You are not the only person who struggles with Paul!" (shout out to you AOt) We talked about a few things and then she came back to his being crazy in writing soooo many letteres and wild in the things he said, etc, etc... I realized then how crucial it is to know Paul's backstory.

In sharing with her his backstory, Christ's love for me and the reality of my relationship with him pierced my heart afresh. Oohhhh, I needed it.

I said to her, "Are you familiar with that expression 'He who has been forgiven much loves much?'" and she wasn't so I continued, "I know this will sound weird, but just go with me ... Let's say when I was in highschool I murdered Ryan's mom and years later, even in knowing that, Ryan chose to love me and yoke himself to me. ... That's what happened with Paul and Jesus! Paul HATED people who followed Christ. HATED them, killed them, he was almost like a Hitler to Christ followers" ... and I proceeded to tell her Paul's ruthless history and how on his way to CONTINUE to kill people Jesus Himself confronted him on the road, struck him blind, and asked him why he was persecuting Him. I said, "Paul WAS crazy, Paul WAS zealous and it's because Jesus knew exactly who he was, what he had done, who he had been, and he said, 'I love you! I will forgive you.' Paul NEVER got over that!"

Even as I was sharing I was again becoming in awe at the incredible mystery and UNMERITED grace of salvation.

Talking to Ryan about it last night and even weeping about it this morning I am just undone about this. To remember/realize that that is exactly what Jesus said to us and continues to say to me ... "I know, Anna. I love you and I forgive you, and more than that I have YOKED myself to you. I will lead you, I will cover you, I will be your fighter, your leader. I love you with an EVERlasting love that is not contingent upon what you do or don't do. You are mine." WHAT?! WHY?! Is that wild?! Does that impact anyone else?!

Geez, I fully admit that of late it hadn't hit my heart as deeply as it used to, probably because I don't normally just sit and think about reality. Truly, this is REALITY. I am SO thankful for last night and the renewal of the sweetness of reality.

We are loved by THE King. We have been forgiven much, I pray we LOVE Him much. Oh, Jesus, I pray I love you MUCH MUCH.

Sadie Update

2009-01-11T08:03:00.000-08:00

Thanks for checking in on Sadie :O)

We have realized QUITE a few things in the past few weeks including that she really IS a Johnson. She has so many of the same traits Ryan and I have, specifically being emotional, needing touch, loving people and being very expressive about all of the above. She is PRECIOUS!

Regarding her 'during the day' ... oh man, what was the last thing I posted? Did I post that she CHEWED OUT OF THE HARD PLASTIC CRATE?! I believe I did, just wanted to give you that reminder.

SO, we tried the Metal Crate on Monday, but this time we put it in front of her coveted Guest Bedroom window so she could still see outside. We came home to the bottom frame being bent in, but still a Sadie inside. When we let her out she was shaking so badly I genuinely thought she was going to have a heart attack. I am beginning to wonder if she was locked in a closet or something as a puppy (seriously).

Did the metal crate again the next day and she was A-OKAY ... just really eager to get outside (if you know what I mean ....) It seems we've resolved the, "You WILL stay in a crate during the day."

SO, we're plotting along, plotting along and then she showed us how emotional (and expressive) she really is. Ryan had to work an INSANE amount of hours this week at home in his office with the door closed. So, we go to bed on Thursday night and I wake up Friday morning and go into his office to check the weather for the day ... "What's that smell?" I turn on the light and she had POOPED ALL OVER RYAN'S FLOOR!!! Like SEVEN different spots! This was NOT because she actually had to go. LOL!! OOOOHHHHHH gosh! So, I went into the bedroom and said, "See, honey, Sadie really loves you." He was like, "What do you mean?" "She missed you a LOT this week and showed her disapproval by pooping all over your office floor. Isn't that sweet?"

OOoohhhh Sadie, what a thin, thin line you are treading.

(butwedoloveyou-atleastIstilldo,daddyalittle)

Hip Hip Hooray for Christmas Vacation!

2009-01-09T16:43:00.000-08:00

Was it great or was it GREAT?! It was pretty dang great!

Ryan was so so so so so sweet and bought me a new camera and one of those digital picture frames... I had NO idea I would even want one of those, but apparently I did because I opened it and just started CRYING I liked it so much!! Now I can see everyone I love sooooo much just scrolling at my desk all day long. YAY!!!

Christmas night we hung out at Ryan's sister's and the next night we went out with his family to Fogo de Chao. Let me just say, it really IS worth all of the raving associated!!! I went in VERY ready to just eat the heck up on the most choice meat and I DID... Proud to say I ate everyone under the table. *pleased smile, puffed out chest and belly* Pic below is of us after dinner. Some would say it's a bad pic of me, I think that's true and it's probably because I gained an IMMENSE amount of weight with just one meal and was unrecognizable even to myself for the next couple of days. BUT, it's a great pic of the fam so there it is :O)

The next day I rode with my in laws (very weird to say!) to Tyler and then began one of the very best trips of my entire life. Because I was there for 9 days I was able to spend very quality time with people I love so deeply. OH it was so good! So, that's the big picture, below are just some of the pics with 'snippets' I will say, one thing that was so sweet was getting to spend so much time with my family. Absence DID make my heart grow fonder ... and it was already pretty fond.

And on to the snippets ...

1. Time with my nephews. My love for them, what can I even say. Below you will find a VERY happy Gooby (that's me)

Swinging with sweet Noah. He wasn't feeling very well so he sat on my lap so we snuggled on the swingset :O)

Here I am practicing my mommy skills (not pregnant, just looking ahead). This little Solomon is so sweet! I don't know what it is about little legs in a diaper that are SOOOOOO cute!

2. Making my grandmother's authentic Italian Spaghetti and Meatballs. They are supposed to cook for 2 days, but we did the Cliff's Notes verion of 6 hours :O)

and... YUM!!! Chowing down on just a few of the 125 handmade meatballs.

3. Getting to see my mom really enjoy her family.

4. Watching Noah feel like a big boy in showing Gooby how he can push the wagon up the trailer. It is so wild how even now the boy in him looks proud to impress me. Beautiful.

We love each other A LOT!

5. SUCH great time with Ryan's friends and my friends and it is so fun because they are now becoming mutual friends!!! We got to have a DELISH meal at Shogun's with my best friend Stefani and a sweet friend of Ryan's (and now MINE), Christy :O)

5. Christmas Baking! Even though we missed pre-Christmas Baking we kept the tradition with Veronica at the reins! She is a BAKE-ER! My mom got her a new recipe book for Christmas so she got to choose whatever cookies she wanted to make :O)

HOWEVER, apparently Lisa and Veronica's cookies weren't artsy enough so my mom grabbed the sprinkles and 'helped' them. Look how pleased Veronica is! LOL!!! That is my mom's best friend, Ms Deborah :O) I LOVE HER!!!

My mom GLOWING with the girls she loves and a littlelittle embarrassed that she grabbed the sprinkles...

6. GREAT time with my sisters! God opened up so much time with the people I love and I am SO thankful!!!

This vacation was SOOOOOOOOO much more than I had ever hoped for! EVER! Ryan came in on Tuesday and he got to see so many people he loves as well :O) OH GOSH it was so good!

I pray your Christmas and New Year's was with people you love too :O)

Dog Whisperer?

2008-12-24T09:57:00.000-08:00

Dog Whisperer? I'm in if it means avoiding paying someone to teach our dog some obedience. But, really it isn't obedience.. I don't know HOW to label it. She is a MYSTERY this one.

If ever you meet her it will be difficult to put together the two 'dogs' in your mind. Maybe we should have a bad dog name for her. Sadie when she's sweetie; Afraidy, Fadey, No Lady, Malady (doesn't rhyme but really works) when she's bad?

On to the newest update. So, as mentioned, she ripped up the carpet again. It REALLY is shocking since she is so docile and sweet always, she just has REAL difficulty being censored it seems as yesterday since she has lost her 'roaming free' priviledge, I put her in the crate and put the door against the wall so she couldn't bang out of it. To our shock and, truly, wonder, since she couldn't get out through door, she CHEWED A SADIE SIZED HOLE in the back of the crate. I'm talking the HARD plastic kind! I don't know HOW she did it, hence the bad dog name since it's like she's a completely different animal.

I was talking to some friends, and one said, "This may sound weird, but I watched these Dog Whisperer videos and it really helped." Our neighbor confirmed and so now I am looking for said videos.

I left her out today and have ZERO concerns. I know the house and all it's contents will be completely fine when we get home ... That's what is SO WEIRD and really makes me mad. She won. HARUMPH! This all started because we don't want her to sit in the guest bedroom chair so we closed the door. NOW, we have the door open and I have zero doubt she is either sitting happily at the guest bedroom window, OR on the guest bedroom chairs stinking it the HECK up.

Any other suggestions? Oh, my mother in law IS bringing a metal crate. But, that only concerns me for her safety ... we've seen that she pretty much won't stop when she sets her mind to it.

Merry Christmas Eve.

Sadie Saga, Part 2

2008-12-23T07:53:00.000-08:00

Welllll, I got home from work yesterday and she had done it again. No need for severe discipline, as soon as I hollered her name she ran to me and rolled over on to her back.

SO, today she will be spending the day in the kennel with the door facing the wall and a blanket between the door and wall so that if she decides to bang, bang, bang to get out of the kennel it won't gouge our wall. The first day we had her, we put her in the kennel while we went to work and she greeted us at the door when we got home. She's a bit of a houdini.

Anyhow, we LOVE this dog. Please pray that she starts being good and gets over this major separation anxiety. We have to take her in to get her final heartworm treatment and is going to stay for two nights... I honestly don't know how she's going to do it.. Eep.

Poor, POOR, Sadie

2008-12-21T18:59:00.000-08:00

Sooooo, I was gone all weekend with two of my VERY besties! It was sooooo good and just WELL with my soul. Thank you, Lord! It had been much much much too long!

So, I get home and Ryan and I decide that we want to lay low with some Pluckers and Mama Mia. Good times, right?

WELL, Sadie almost got the PERMANENT boot from our house. Seriously.

Since we got her, we just let her roam free in the house while we're gone. She has never chewed on anything/given us pause to our letting her stay out of a kennel during the day.

That was before today, my dears.

We get home from picking up dinner and a movie and Sadie had CHEWED UP, nay, PULLED BACK the carpet in front of the room she loves. I mean BACK!!! We closed the door to the guest room before we left because she's getting in a habit of sitting in our chair in there and we don't like that. SO, we closed the door and left. We were 'welcomed' home with Sadie's hugs and love and THEN the great discovery of the carpet COMPLETELY pulled back in our hallway leading into our guest room. GEEZ LOU FREAKING UISE, this dog! She is a determined pup!

She was pretty much IMMEDIATELY excommunicated from our home, and if it hadn't been SO dire I would have taken a picture of what she did. Severe punishment ensued, screaming of our not keeping her was declared, and when tempers cooled a bit we realized we could give her another chance.

Pray for this sweet pup. She is SUCH a gentle little spirit, but when she has a mind to it there is apparently no stopping her. Please pray that she will see the error of her ways so we can keep her.

And if someone happens to have a carpet stapler they're willing to let us borrow, please let me know.

We do love you, Sadie.

Poor Sadie.

2008-12-16T07:44:00.000-08:00

So, I've been home sick since Sunday and sweet Sadie got SO excited Monday morning when I didn't go to work only to realize my being at home didn't mean extra fun for her. Same today, she smiled her little dog smile and then realized she just needed to go about her normal 'day business' as though I wasn't here. AND, we ran out of dog food yesterday so I am home AND not feeding her.

How's that for bonding.

It's a Wonderful Life.

2008-12-13T19:56:00.001-08:00

So, all Christmas season I've been wanting to see "It's A Wonderful Life." I really don't know why... maybe it's because it seems like classic Christmas, warm and fuzzy. AND, I've never seen it.

I was just out shopping, came home and made chilli cheese nachos, and sat down to see what was on T.V. We don't have cable so I'm flipping through and the ONE thing on T.V. right now is "It's A Wonderful Life!" I just smiled at God's sweetness.

So, it was 15 minutes until the movie was over, and I started watching when he was in the cab and the cabbie didn't know him. By the time he chased his wife into the crowded room and she didn't know who he was I was fighting back SOBBING! I don't know WHY this made me so emotional... All I can say is, "What a GREAT MOVIE!!" My GOSH! Then he gets home and doesn't even care that he supposed to be arrested, owes all this money, he is RIVETED with his children, his wife bursts into the house and they embrace... geez. No wonder this is a classic.

Oh man, it just makes me so thankful for all that I have. To realize and think about what life would be like if those I loved didn't even know me... had never known who I was. Horrible. What a GREAT movie to remind you that what matters is knowing and being known. Maybe that's why I was touched so deeply ... to see a man who knows each person SO well and they don't know him at all.... don't know he exists. Ow.

Anyhow, I just wanted to share about this. I LOVE this movie and I can't wait to see the first three fourths of it :O)

I can't BELIEVE it!

2008-12-12T22:36:00.000-08:00

SOOOOOO, I was just reading a friend's blog and found a saw on his blog a video clip that I saw YEARS ago and have told sooooooooo many people about because it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

SO, here is the link! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMS0O3kknvk What a wonderful surprise!!!!

Also, we had our Staff Christmas Party tonight and I had so much fun! :O) I will post pics as soon as I'm able :O)

Two Words

2008-12-08T07:49:00.000-08:00

Macaroni Grill.

Thank you Christmas Party Season.

Shrimp and Artichoke Dip
Bruschetta
Mushroom Raviolli
Cute Christmas Mugs as party favor

A GREAT party!

In abundance.

2008-12-04T06:27:00.000-08:00

Grace and peace in abundance.... Grace and peace in ABUNDANCE! Grace and peace be YOURS in ABUNDANCE through the knowledge of God and our Lord Jesus Christ!

2 Peter stopped me in my tracks this morning and I was barely even into it.... To say "grace and peace be yours in ABUNDANCE" is no small thing, and it is through the knowledge of God and our Lord Jesus Christ! If that is true, why aren't we constantly living in abundant grace and peace? What keeps us from that?

I wanted to look up the 'root' of the word "knowledge" because I am thinking the key might be there... WoW! I jumped over to Crosswalk to get the root, but to do that I have to first look at the verse in the New American Standard Version and it reads:

Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord;

Love THAT!

So, back to "knowledge" ... That's what I thought.

Strong's Number: 1921
Browse Lexicon
Original Word
Word Origin
epiginosko
from (1909) and (1097)
Transliterated Word
TDNT Entry
Epiginosko
1:689,119
Phonetic Spelling
Parts of Speech
ep-ig-in-oce'-ko
Verb
Definition
to become thoroughly acquainted with, to know thoroughly
to know accurately, know well
to know
to recognise
by sight, hearing, of certain signs, to perceive who a person is
to know i.e. to perceive
to know i.e. to find out, ascertain
to know i.e. to understand

I specifically love "To become thoroughly acqainted with, to know thoroughly."

Our grace and peace will continue to grow, and even into ABUNDANCE as we grow to know God and Jesus Christ more and more... that is just SO TRUE! How could it help but multiply in realizing, learning and having GOD HIMSELF write on our hearts who He really IS. Worthy of trust, fully loving and good, in complete control and GOSH those are just a few.

He is SO rich!

Anyhow, I just wanted to dive into that you with you a bit this morning. Lord, one little half of a verse and there is just so much of You. Draw us deeper and deeper into Your word, Father. Help us to stop and sit and think and talk to you about it and ask you about it when we are impacted by something you have spoken to us through your Word. There is SOOOO much of you to take in, thank you for the depths!!! Thank you for drawing us in.

YESSSSSSSSS!!!!

2008-12-02T17:38:00.000-08:00

I do not doubt that God loves me in the details :O) Case in point would be that Ryan and I had to run to Lowe's and Wal Mart today after work and I was soooooo hungry. I said as much to Ryan that I would probably have to grab something to rip into while we were there. SO, because I was hungry, we divided the list to conquer and go faster. I grabbed my goods, went to the front, didn't see Ryan and couldn't reach him on his phone so I thought MAYBE he had already paid and was waiting for me. I very last minute grabbed some sour cream and cheese chips to add to my purchase, bought it, then proceeded with my bag of goods to the open area at the front in front of produce. I know, it's the same in every Wal Mart. I proceeded to open my bag of chips, and I am not even kidding, I don't know that I could have been happier. Just standing there in the middle of Wal Mart, holding my grocery bag, munching on chips. THEN, I turned around and there were FREE HOLIDAY TWINKIES at the bakery! Can you even BELIEVE that?! I have NEVER seen something wrapped FOR FREE at Wal Mart. BUT, there they were. A big bowl with long twinkies, white icing and Christmas sprinkels. Hello. Obviously for me.

So, I grabbed one, opened the wrapper and proceeded to eat the twinkie.

LOL oooooohhhhh gosh! Wal Mart stereotype hello, Anna Johnson! Ryan walks up and I am SURE he was thinking, "For real? Is this my wife?" For I was standing, still in the open area, alternating between my bag of chips, and my free twinkie. I was L-I-V-I-N-G and more than one child stopped walking and stared at me in flat out envy.

As they should have.

It was a great moment :O)

Oh, to give THANKS! :O)

2008-11-30T19:10:00.000-08:00

You know, I started feeling really bad just after Thanksgiving festivities, and it wasn't the aftermath of the feast that had me feeling gross. It was that I get so stressed in trying to decide what we're going to do, who we're going to see, and that instead of looking forward to holidays with HUGE excitement I feel bad that I can't do more and be more. I get lost in feelings of false guilt. It's been that way ever since my parents divorced and we had to start choosing who to see on what holiday and for how long. Gross.

SO, this year in our Father's sweetness He showed me and is encouraging me to anticipate and be excited about the holidays because Thanksgiving was and always is wonderful. Thank you, thank you, thank you Lord for the great sweetness that 'is' my family :O)
I am soooooo blessed to have family to choose from and coordinate with. It is glorious and I am so thankful! Gosh, what about being with people who make your heart warm isn't something to look forward to? To realize, with most of these loved ones, I only get to see them twice a year.

What a GIFT Thanksgiving is!

We spent Thanksgiving with the "Johnsons" and I am still getting to meet some of the relatives on the Johnson Family side, definitely still getting to know everyone and they're getting to know me.

Then, we went to Dallas and stayed with Ryan's brother, sister in law and niece. SUCH a good time!

On Saturday we spent time with the "Mattern" (my maiden name) side of the family and I got to see my dad, grandparents, aunt, uncle, sister, brother in law and SWEET NEPHEWS!!! ... I realized with a SHOCK and a START that it had been 6 months since I've seen them! That is entirely too long as evidenced by Solomon SHRIEKING when I walked into the door... running to me at a FULL sprint ... I swept him up into my arms and he held on as tight as he could, relaxed a little and sighed, "Oh Goob." Oh gosh, I cried it was SOOO sweet! They call me, "Gooby" and in his little heart sigh all he could breathe was, "Oh Goob" and just rest in my arms. Too much, I tell ya! Here are their precious faces, my Noah and Solomon :O) Thank you, thank you Lord for these sweet times. I cherish them.

OH! though I didn't get a picture of this, a memory I want to write here so I don't forget: Noah and I laying on the carpet in the guest bedroom, me pretend sleeping, and Noah whispering singing to me every word of Twinkle Twinkle Little Start in his little boy voice. I WISH I knew some great quote about children being little pieces of heaven, or making the earth stand still, or purity and innocence being painful in their goodness... they would all apply to this moment.

SOOOOO, fun on the living room floor... Noah literally pinning me (and laughing and being SO proud! HI-LARIOUS!)

A sweet Solomon face :O) This kid laughs and smiles ALL of the time, but a photogenic kiddo he is not. I have YET to get him to smile for a camera...

Noah likes to smile for the ol' cam, but doesn't like the flash :O)

My little model :O)

Here is Solomon smiling (because he DOESN'T know I have the camera... literally hiding behind a recliner here!)

Heading into Christmas I REFUSE to live under any false guilt, and will instead GREATLY anticipate getting to be with people I treasure. YAY!!! Time with people I love and so soon!!!

Thank you, Jesus, for another sweet, sweet, sweet Thanksgiving.

Pics, pics, and MORE pics! YAY!!

2008-11-25T05:54:00.001-08:00

Sooooo, for the cruise for our 1 year anniversary: It was 7 days long and we went to Jamaica, Grand Cayman and Cozumel! A LOT of pics are on Facebook, so head that way if you want to see more :O)These were the people we got to eat with every night... we had PRAYED that God would bring who He desired and He brought an AWESOME table together! We looked forward to dinner every night! (food was great too :O) )

We had 3 days 'at sea'

Our routine 'at sea' ... wake up at 9:45, go eat breakfast, head up to this deck to layout and either read, listen to sermons, or sleep. At 2 p.m. Ryan would go and get our lunch - DESSERT TRAYS!!! Then we'd sleep/relax more, head to sushi at 5 ish and then 'real' dinner at 8:15. Yes. It WAS great!

There were two 'elegant' nights and this was the first one. Steak and lobster tails all around!! :O) THE BEST lobster I have ever had!

Quiet time on the deck with Jesus my first morning there :O) So great :O)

We got back from our cruise the day before our actual Anniversary ... I walked into our home and exclaimed, "WE LIVE IN A MANSION!" LOL! We had gotten so used to our cabin on the cruise :O) It was WONDERFUL to spend our anniversary in our home. And Ryan, being the absolute MAN that he is, STILL delivered flowers to work for our Anniversary. THEN, my sister in law and brother in law took us out to an AMAZING sushi dinner ... YUM!!!!

On .... to SADIE!! Our new dog! Very tragically the week before we left for the cruise my dog Caedmon (who has been staying at my in-laws for the past year since we were in the condo) was hit by a truck and killed. Very sad because he was going to come home to us when we got back from our cruse (now that we have a house and backyard). SO! We really prayed for a dog with the same personality as his: Docile, gentle, not a huge barker, just a laid back dog that wants to love and be loved. We also prayed that we would 'just know' when we saw the dog... and that is what happened! YAY!! Sadie is 2 years old and some kind of retriever mix. Feel free to share your guesses as to her breed because we have no idea. I am sure MUCH better pics will follow but here are a few for now :O)

She is NO FAN of the flash... crack me up! BUT, one of my favorite things about her are her ears :O)

LOL! This was the first time she saw the flash... totally startled her :O)

Soooooo, that's how things 'are' in the Johnson household these days :O) (Oh my gosh, we're a "household"!!!) We are loving our new home together, our new dog... Christmas is almost completely up and we're starting a new habit of turning everything off by 8 p.m. to start winding down by studying, listening to teaching, getting in the Word... all of the things that are SO important to grow into who I want to 'be' but don't do if I don't make time for them :O)

It's a new leaf :O)

OH! Also, we're going to have to intall a doggie door ... any suggestions?

LIFE has happened!

2008-11-24T05:39:00.000-08:00

WOW! It's been a while since I've blogged and it's because LIFE has happened... in such great ways!

I don't have the pics 'on hand' right now so I'll just give the sneak preview here and post some pics sometime this week.

1. We took a 7 Day Cruise for our 1 Year Anniversary! ONE YEAR as of Nov 10. Can you even believe it?! Man! I don't even know what to say about this year, except that God really can and DOES and HAS done this past year exceedingly abundantly more than all we could have asked or imagined!

2. We're all moved into to our abode (well, not FULLY decorated, but close) and loving the heck out of it!! We had MUCH debate about the color the accent wall would be in our living room and went with a deep blue. I only mention it because it has FINALLY, in the third week of November, gotten cold enough to light a fire and it is breathtaking against this color!!! I got a little tear in my eye the first time we fired it up. (shocking that I would tear up, I know). So, we are LOVING the blue and LOVE LOVING a gas fireplace with no prep or clean up.

3. Ryan finished his 2nd semester of his Masters last week and is KICKING BUTT! He would be embarrassed that I put that, but he just IS and I have to give him public accolades for it :O) I am SO proud of him. If he stays on this track, he will graduate Nov 2009. WOW!

4. We are leading a small group and LOVE IT!! This is our first chance to lead together and it is great... also, our small group is just so good! The people God has brought together, well, we just have a really tender spot in our heart for them :O) It started as an 8 week commitment, but we're going to keep going. There is NOTHING like doing life with other people!!

5. Being that it is still CRAZY hot here, I didn't really put two and two together that Thanksgiving was this week. When I did, and realized I had time this Sat but none after this, I decorated for Christmas this weekend!! YAY!! So now we have our tree up and Christmas Decor... it is almost all I can even STAND! I have ALWAYS wanted outside lights (and never had them) so this week they're going up. ALSO, since we're in a house, I realized I can GET MORE CHRISTMAS STUFF!!! WEEEEEEE!! :O)

6. As of Saturday we have a DOG! She is TOO precious and we named her Sadie. I have already come to call her, "Sadie Lady" and I'm pretty sure she likes it :O) She is a 2 year old golden retriever mix and is so docile and gentle, which is exactly what we wanted. For those of you who knew my sweet Caedmon, she is an exact personality match :O)

Like I said, I'll post pics sometime this week. Let me just sum it up by telling you that yesterday around 4:30 it had started getting dark, and I walked in the living room to find football on TV, our windows opening to the greenbelt behind our house with the Christmas tree in front of it, my dog sleeping on the living room floor, and my husband sleeping on the couch. Is this really my life?! This SWEETNESS?! We walked our dog for the first time together last night around 9:30 and I got a little emotional because it was the fulfilling of a YEARS long girl's dream. To walk at night with my husband and our dog.

Oh man, God is GOOD. He is SO sweet. There really aren't words to give Him enough glory and thanks for all He has done and continues to do. What am I THANKFUL for this Thanksgiving??? Where do I start?

Love to you,
Anna

Making the house our home :O)

2008-10-31T18:01:00.001-07:00

Hey everyone :O)

I just posted OODLES of pics of our new home on Facebook... we aren't nearly finished decorating yet, but I wanted to let you see it because we are SO HAPPY with the way it has turned out. I JUST LOVE IT!! Thank you Jesus! :O)

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=82014&id=648660305

Do you know I am here with you?

2008-10-23T09:30:00.000-07:00

Oh my goodness... walking back just now I didn't know if I would be blogging about this and was praying about whether or not I should. For one there is no possible way I can adequately express what just happened to me, also though it was so good and tender and sweet that I was wondering if it should just be between me and God, but as I was walking back I remembered that I needed to email my Soul Revolution Group to remind them of some stuff. As I was emailing them it just poured out of me so I am going to paste below what happened:

My hands are frozen right now because I was just outside for a couple of hours taking a walk with God. Can I just encourage you in this... whatever you felt God talking to you about last night in our group or lately, please take a couple of hours in the next few days to meet with just Him. What He just did in my heart and the renewing of my spirit is nothing short of amazing.

Every month Gateway gives every staff member a day of Solitude to just be with you and God. Today is my day of Solitude and this morning my plan was to walk to Starbucks, grab my favorite drink and just take a walk and talk with God. This weekend Ryan and I are moving out of our condo and moving into our house and so I wanted today to be about thanking God for this first amazing year of marriage and all that He has done. I wanted to take a walk and celebrate everything and also say "good bye" to living in this area. There is a little church near our house that has always intrigued me when I've been walking and I thought that this morning I would walk, grab my Starbucks and just walk over to that church and linger, you know? Just take it slow.

So, as I'm walking over there, I walk around outside and I just keep walking deeper and deeper into their property which is set back with lots of huge, beautiful trees. I walk up to a labyrinth on the back of their property and just start walking it slowly ... all of the sudden I am remembering last night when we were doing that exercise and sensing God asking me, "Do you want me to do that again?" and I responded yes because I felt He was asking me about the weight and peace and rest I felt in doing that exercise. As I am walking slowly, leisurely I just feel that weight and peace come back and it was so good. For minutes I was walking in stillness and then would just talk to Him about whatever came to my heart. I was talking freely to Him about things that had been on my heart/burdening me and then I would just continue to walk in stillness and 'clear mind' … Then I felt Him ask, "Do you know that I am with you? Do you feel me with you?" It was the SAME thing I felt He had said to me last night when we were all being still and I felt then that Jesus was saying, "I am with you. I am right here." So, today when He said that, He just kept saying it and I was weeping openly and thanking Him for wooing me to this place to walk with me and show me that. I had forgotten that He literally walks with me EVERY day. I hadn't forgotten that He hears my prayers and is powerful, but I haven't been walking knowing He is physically right there with me.

So, I keep walking slowly, aware of His nearness and when I got to the end/middle of the labyrinth there is a stone and I just fell to my knees and wept. I poured my heart out about everything that was there and I just really sensed in my heart He was just stroking my hair and welcoming me back to Himself.

You guys, it was so good. There is no way I can adequately describe what happened except to say that He fully guided my coming there this morning to come back to walking with Him. When I was 'done' crying and being with Him I went inside the church and asked to borrow a Bible, pen and paper and went back out to the rock to sit and read and write. I had a Jesus story in my mind, but couldn't remember where it was, so I opened the Bible and this is one of those Bibles that has side notes that better explain whatever is being said on that page, and I just started WEEPING because this side note said, "What joy for those you choose to bring near, those who live in your holy courts. What joy awaits us inside your holy temple." That is EXACTLY what God did with me this morning!!!

I am still processing how God Himself would be so tender and specific and sweet to draw me near to Himself like that. There is NOTHING that I have done to deserve that kind of love…. His love for me says to me, "Though you may feel you have lost Me, I never lose you. I always know where you are, what you are thinking, what you need and why you are not walking with Me or talking to Me."

Again, I can't even begin to express the depth to which He touched me in this. (my beeper just went off :O) ). He was so gentle to draw me to Himself like that.

Anyhow, that verse was in Psalm 65 if you want to read it later. All of that to say, please take some time to be with Him in the next few days and be willing to walk out whatever you feel He is doing. For me, this morning was just me walking out what I was wanting to do and having the time to walk slowly and walk as I desired. … it led me to an amazing encounter with God. I long for that for all of us. I pray we will give Him the freedom to talk to us/do in us whatever He is working to do. HE IS GOOD and we can trust Him.

As I am wrapping this up, I feel Psalm 16:11 - You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.

My Chance...

2008-10-19T13:05:00.000-07:00

http://www.gatewaychurch.com/AboutGateway/ListenOnline/tabid/147/Default.aspx
Click on "Moving Toward Others"

Do I even KNOW you?

2008-10-17T05:54:00.000-07:00

So, here I am, sitting at work, typing along, talking to a new dear dear friend, and her phone rings. She answers and all of the sudden is speaking FLUENTLY in German. WHAT?!?!?! I had no IDEA she spoke another language! INCREDIBLE!!!

ARRGGH!!! I love languages and was JUST thinking either yesterday or the day before how I really do want to be fluent in Spanish. So.

1. I can't even BELIEVE she's just ripping it out in this long conversation and I had NO idea she spoke it. (She's STILL talking and I am just SOAKING it in and and enjoying the heck out of this fun surprise!)

2. I wonder if it's time for me to start REALLY pursuing becoming fluent en espanol... I took 5 years, but just never used it to make it mine, you know?

Anyhow, that was a VERY fun surprise! I have never heard German for any length of time and it's a really fun language!!! Beautiful :O) I wonder what it was like at the Tower of Babel when everyone just started speaking other languages... that probably wasn't beautiful, more scary, but either way it's interesting to think about how this all started :O)

Here's to hoping you get to overhear great conversations that you don't understand today :O)

A GREAT Sunday Afternoon!

2008-10-12T18:32:00.000-07:00

I would take a picture to evidence my great afternoon, but my vanity prevents me.

Let me just say: Spaten Premium, Chips & Salsa, Sour Punch Straws, Popcorn, Frito Pie and The Dallas Cowboys.

Amen

Do you want a Revolution? WHOOP WHOOP!

2008-10-08T11:06:00.000-07:00

LOL!! I LOVE that song and I'm singing it a LOT these days (Kirk Franklin, I'm sure you could check it out on YouTube... actually here's the link for kicks and giggles: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSQQRGVCJV4&feature=related ).

Anyhow, I'm not actually singing the full song, just shouting those words inside because they're the only ones I know :O) BUT, what keeps bringing it to mind is that Gateway (our church) is doing a 60 Day experiment with God called Soul Revolution and almost 3,000 people have signed up to try it. I was emailing a friend about it today and realized I haven't blogged about it. If you haven't heard about it, or even if you have, you should SERIOUSLY consider doing it!

All info is at www.soulrevolution.net. I hope you'll check it out :O)

Soooooo sad.

2008-10-07T17:31:00.001-07:00

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=3906861&cl=10074029&ch=4226714&src=news

My weekend:

2008-09-28T14:22:00.000-07:00

I was reading Psalm 63 on Friday and came across verse 3: "Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you." That verse really stopped me... better than LIFE?! Wow. And I stopped and talked to God about that...is your love really better than life, etc, and I thought back to the ways I have experienced Him and how He has blown me away in the way that He loves me and I love that it says BECAUSE your love is better than life... How we have to first acknowledge experiencing that love and we will THEN glorify Him with our lips. That is just so true!

Anyhow, after pondering that and now having warm fuzzies in realizing the full on truth that His love REALLY IS better than like, my husband came home and fully confirmed what God and I had just been talking about. I am BLOWN away by the way that God loves me through my husband! Wooooooo do I LOVE my hubs being a great man, submitted to God :O)

My Friday night:

Ryan came home with sooooooooo BEAUTIFUL roses and then sent me into the living room to completely relax while he made an incredible dinner! Man alive, Lord, your love IS better than life!!!

On Saturday we tackled the massive home makeover (specifically all doors, trim and kitchen). MAD PROPS AND THANKS to Danyelle, Anne, Michelle, Heidi and Christy.... and of course my hubby shubba lubby (sorry everyone ;) ).... This is where we are now... more pics to come!

If in the next few weeks you have a hankering to do some painting, just give me a call :O)

So glad you came :O)

2008-09-26T13:03:00.000-07:00

A friend was sharing how she feels like she's lost the desire to be with God, to come to Him and is kind of scared about the lack of desire, and the lack of a repentant heart. She doesn't want to feel this way, but just does and doesn't know what to do about it. I can TOTALLY relate to that and told her that that is exactly where I've been recently and how I didn't really become repentant until I got in the Word and asked God to open my eyes to His words and anything He's trying to teach me.

I know it's different for everyone in every season/circumstance, but I would say that if you're feeling like you SHOULD have a repentant heart, ask Him for one and if you even should feel repentant. Could be that it isn't repentance that is 'needed,' but a renewed longing for Him. He'll tell you :O)

I have a spiritual coach through work and I was talking to him about all of this on Wed and he is always giving really good illustrations. He was saying how with his six year old daughter he ALWAYS desires to give her a hug when she gets home from school. Some days she's all about it, and some days he can tell that she just doesn't want to and that is okay. It doesn't change his love for her. But sometimes, as her father, he reaches out for her because he wants to and it's his responsibility, right and privilege as her father. One thing though that he never does is let go first. When she comes to him to hug him, love him, etc he is sure to never let her go first. He will stand there and love her for as long as she wants or needs.

He said, "She must have had a really hard day in kindergarten a couple of days ago because she came home looking for me and when she found me she just grabbed me and held on. And she didn't let go, so we just stood there holding each other and loving each other. And when she was ready, she let go." I just WEPT when he told me that because it is SOOOOO important to remember that just because we don't feel intimate with God it doesn't mean He doesn't love us just the same and it doesn't mean that when we come back he may not be there with the same love.

When we come to Him for love and to reconnect with him He is there always. WE are always the first ones to let go. Whether we come to Him and get filled up with His love, and in our ignorance walk away and get depleted again, and then come back and the pattern repeats... OR, we come, connect and get filled up, and then holding onto His hand start walking again... Either way, His love for us doesn't change. I love the visual of Him holding me in the hallway as soon as I walk back into His heart. I love that He DOESN'T let go of me. Ever. He has promised that He will never leave or forsake me. That is the truth and that is sweet.

Anyhow, love to you, and I hope that your time with Him is sweet in knowing that when you come to Him, His love for you hasn't changed at all. He's just happy that you came.

One down...

2008-09-15T08:15:00.000-07:00

Our first project... yay!!! :O) (Soooooo, there have been some questions about these pics. 1. We are still living in our condo, we just wanted to knock this out before we move. 2. The tan is the original, the black is the 'new and improved.' I'm all about darker colors :O) )

The Bride Cometh ...

2008-09-14T18:30:00.000-07:00

When we first came to Austin, a guy on the side of the road was asking for donations for ARM ... "Austin Restoration Ministries." I don't remember if we gave him any money, but he gave us a little slip of paper with their name, mission statement, and phone number. Essentially, it doesn't matter who you are, what your issue, or if you pay... if you want off of the streets, drugs, alcohol, etc, they take you in no questions asked, no money charged, you just have to commit to their program for nine months. Every time Ryan and I went to throw the slip of paper away we just couldn't... throughout the almost one year we've lived here God has continued to give us opportunities to be connected to their ministry and today we got to go to the wedding of a man who runs one of the houses.

This was probably THE most celebratory wedding I have EVER been to. Ever.

They had the service on a Sunday morning so when we walked in the pastor was wrapping up his sermon and it was GREAT to hear him just shouting and quoting scripture... It just felt GOOD. People were sitting around white rectangular tables, purple flowers in the middle of each, the wedding 'arch' up front covered in purple and white flowers with netting... Then he finished and said, "All right, let's get some folk married." He stepped down off of the podium, the music started and the groom walked out... everyone started CHEERING!!! Ryan and I just started happy laughing :O) Then the wedding music started and when the door opened and the first bridesmaid started walking down the aisle a woman hollered, "Ya'll get up. Everybody up." and EVERYONE stood to their feet and started clapping and cheering for them... it was a 10 minute standing ovation welcoming the bride! When the last bridesmaid walked down they closed the door and the room got completely silent (everyone still standing). The song started and it was SO LOUD and with SUCH expectancy ... it just kept swelling and when they opened the door I swear a RUSH poured through the room, the bride stepped out and a woman shouted "Hallelujah!" and everyone was praying out loud, "Praise God," and "Thank You Jesus" EVERYONE was clapping and shouting and welcoming her... I just started crying... I couldn't even help it. Talk about, "Here comes the bride!" We shouted and clapped, people stepped into the aisle taking pictures of her and she was walking SO SLOW and just soaking it in. It was honestly one of the most BEAUTIFUL things I have ever witnessed or been a part of... this room full of people, all colors, delivered from all kinds of things, some still in just the beginning of trying to walk out... I was sooooo moved.

Oh, there are SO MANY things I could share, but that is what impacted me most about the wedding. I have NEVER seen something like that and could only think, "THIS is what it should be like. I can't imagine how cherished and celebrated she feels."

Okay, so, now I'm getting choked up realizing that this just a GLIMPSE of the welcome WE will get when we go to heaven. The bride of Jesus Christ Himself. I can't even begin to fathom the celebration and my heart aches at the thought.

Hello, "Thirty!"

2008-08-17T15:13:00.000-07:00

I've heard for YEARS that people are typically much crazier about their thirties than their twenties, so aside from the SHOCK of thirty... I've been excited.

Thus far, "thirty" has not disappointed!

Driving to work that morning I was honestly a little sad. Ryan was at home sick and in still being feeling fairly new to Austin I didn't know if my birthday would be celebrated. FULLY silly in hindsight but that morning it felt very real .... WELL!!! My wonderful new friends BLEW ME AWAY by bringing food and treats to our group that morning, chocolate birthday cake and THEN when I got to my cube they had crazy wonderful decorated!! And, those fake flowers are staying in case anyone was wondering. I'm also thinking I'm going to put up a mini Christmas tree just for kicks and giggles :O)

Anyhow, 'thirty' continued with closing on our first home (many pics and details below) and we are now getting to play with what we want to do to make it "Ryan and Anna" as a friend so perfectly put it! This is what we're thinking for kitchen counter and cabinets... WEEEE! :O)

Ryan had said earlier in the week that we could go anywhere for my birthday dinner and in thinking and praying about it all I wanted to do was grab some sushi and wine, have a nice dinner at home with my hubs, and then write in our "Story of God's Glory" book. When we got home from the closing, Ryan told me to hop into a bubble bath to chill a bit - WONDERFUL!!! He put on candles and worship music and it was greatness. When I got out he had cleaned the entire house, lit candles EVERYWHERE, arranged the sushi on a platter and chilled our champagne. A GREAT first 'married' birthday :O)

And, apparently, thirty is the gift that just KEEPS on giving because I've been gifted with a massage from Clairie, tickets to the "So You Think You Can Dance Tour" with sweet Winks (I KNOW!!!!) and my husband is paying for me to go skydiving with Stefani... a dream all of my life in the making!

"Hello 'Thirty' ... WONDERFUL to meet you!"

Important Note: James 1:17 ~ Every desirable and beneficial gift comes out of heaven. The gifts are rivers of light cascading down from the Father of Light. There is nothing deceitful in God, nothing two-faced, nothing fickle. "... Thank you, Jesus :O) I love you too."

The house that God built.

2008-08-13T19:29:00.000-07:00

To say that we bought a house just isn't accurate at ALL... God has literally given us a house and He has BLOWN our minds in the way He lined it all up!!! He has done this in such a way that it has taken me a week since officially closing to actually attempt to blog about it because it is so wild.. SO, this may get long, but I'll do my best to be as brief as possible while not minimizing the BEAUTY of it all!!! I can promise you with all confidence that it will be worth the read.

*SQUEAL!!!!*

A few months ago when I was driving back to Austin from Tyler I was in a VERY serious accident. Long story short, I was driving about 75 mph in one of those zones where the concrete walls are directly against the lanes (no shoulder), hydroplaned, realized it was going to be very seriously (possibly take my life) and I closed my eyes and said, "Lord Jesus put your hedge of protection around me, I pray that your arms will physically surround me...." and didn't stop praying until the noises stopped. What had happened was I hit one wall head on (at 70ish mph), my car spun around and hit the back of the car on the same wall and that shot me back across to the other side head on into the other wall. No other cars hit me, I was not injured in ANY way. I had one tinsy scratch on my wrist and didn't even get a bruise from the seatbelt. It was fully wild and OBVIOUSLY a miracle. So, the car was totalled. We got the money from the insurance company to replace the car, but everytime we started looking neither Ryan or I felt a peace about it AT all, so we decided that we would just carpool until God showed us what we were supposed to do.

In the meantime, our lease for our condo was is up in October, and with Ryan working full time, in school pursuing his Master's full time we had started asking God if we just needed to resign for another year, move to a smaller place to save money, or buy a home. There were a lot of concerns but the greatest was that it would just be MUCH to much to buy a home while Ryan was working and schooling it full time. So, we just laid it down and asked God to direct us.

Sooooo, one of Ryan's friend from work was leaving to go to another company and we went to his going away party. As we were leaving to go home, we went upstairs one last time to say goodbye and these girls asked us to sit down. Thinking that we really 'should' we do, they find out we're newlyweds and want to hear our story, then one girl looks at the other and says, "Kelly! You have to tell them your story." Long story short Kelly shares that she has quit her job, and is moving to DC in September to marry someone. She says, "So, all I need to do now is sell my house here and find a job." She said flippantly, "It's right next to Gateway (where I work) so if you know anyone send them myway!" Something in me perked up and I was thinking, "We need to go see her house!" But i didn't want to say anything to Ryan because I didn't want him to feel pressured at all in thinking I wanted a house. SO, I prayed that if it was okay for me to say something, that Ryan would bring up something about buying a house. That weekend we go to Ryan's brother's house in Dallas, who has just bought a new home, and on the way back to Austin Ryan looks at me and says, "Just and I were talking and telling me what they paid and we can TOTALLY buy a house." And my heart lept and I screamed, "I know and I think we should go see Kelly's!!!"

SO, now come the bullet points to TRY to sum this up:

We go see her house... it is PERFECT for us: 3 bedrooms, 2 full bath, it's on a green belt so noone will ever have a house right behind this one, it is blocks from a community center and an elementary school and it is less than half a mile from the church where I work (Hello!! Remember, I still don't have a car and could literally WALK to work!!)
She bought it as a repo and has COMPLETELY gutted and redone the house so EVERYTHING is brand new as of two years ago.
Before leaving she tells us we HAVE to meet her neighbors, we go over and the guy is someone Ryan had met at church and really liked!
We tell her to pray about the price, commit that we won't talk her down from whatever she thinks is fair, she gives us a price that blesses our face off and THEN suggests that we just buy/sell ourselves without agents and that she will just rent from us until she moves in September.
The house never had to go on the market (Blessing for her in not having to deal with that AND blessing for us as houses in this price range are snapped up in almost 7 seconds in Austin)
We are given an amazing interest rate on the loan and get a SWEET down payment deal since I'm a first time buyer.
We were able to buy Homeowner's Insurance at HALF the going rate through Progressive! (crazy!!)
ANNNNNNNNNddddd, we only saw the house two times before we told her we were in. We never even had to stinking look at another home! We just KNEW because of all of the things we had prayed and God lined up that He was telling us to keep walking, so check THIS out. As we leave her house after telling her we are going to buy it, I ask Ryan how his day was and he said, "It was a good day, but I went to register for the summer semester and I missed the deadline by two days." YOU GUYS!! During this ENTIRE house buying process Ryan has been out of school, we signed on the house and he starts school again next week! I KNOW IT!
We were scheduled to close last Thursday and it got bumped four times. It was weird because it was the ONLY thing that had gone 'wrong' in this entire process.... the ease of this process has been jawdropping, everything from inspectors to appraisors to neighbors, to sellers, EVERYTHING. At every step we have told God that if this wasn't His desire to just close the doors and that would be okay. So, when closing kept getting pushed back we went to Him again and said, "this is still yours, just let us know." Wellllll, the day we walked in and ACTUALLY closed? MY 30TH BIRTHDAY!!!!! As we are signing the closing papers, I start giggling and said, "God just gave me a house for my birthday."
Another 'kicker' and with this I really will close as we have now come 'full' circle... When we started praying about buying a house we didn't have the money for a down payment, we just knew God would make it happen if it was supposed to. ... The money we were given from the insurance company for my car was the same amount we used to buy this house.

Amen and amen and PRAISE THE LORD!!!! Thank you!!!!!!! We are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO eager to see what You will do in and through this home. It is Yours.

"Booby"

2008-07-29T18:49:00.000-07:00

Who knew this could be such a beautiful word, but when screeched with great delight from the lips of my nephew there have been few sweeter sounds. No, no sicko here... My nephew Noah calls me Gooby, his precious younger brother Solomon (2 and just now learning how to speak) is OVER come with delight when he sees me and in a way that only a two year old can screams, "BOOOBY!!!" and it brings tears of joy to my eyes. I mean, really, does it MATTER what they call you as long as they are saying your name with a screech of glee? I didn't think so either.

SO, this past weekend in Tyler was beyond all that is 'sweet and wonderful'! It was PERFECTLY timed in that Ryan was going to Tijuana for a missions trip and we needed to get our car fixed in Tyler. SO, we thought it would be perfect timing for me to go get it fixed, and skydive with my best friend, Stefani, for our 30th birthdays. BUT, it turns out God was just working to get me there :) Neither of the above happened, but what did was an amazing weekend provided by my Savior in ways that only He could:

The people my heart needed to see, God completely arranged one on one time with: My mom, Lisa, Veronica, Jimmy (step dad), Stefani, Betsy (came in from Dallas), Claire, Heather, Becky, the boys ... wonderful!

I got to go to Girls Night In at my old church, which marked one year to the weekend that I said, "Yes, God I will be your girl" and He changed my life in every way... He is glorious! I will literally be standing in our kitchen washing dishes sometimes and just start crying thinking, "I could have missed this" if I hadn't said "yes" to Him.

At Girls Night In I got to hug the necks of most every woman at Grace that was SOOOOO precious to me. I missed out on a couple, but only a couple :)

I spent Friday night with some of my very best friends 'winning over' our waiters at Cheddar's. Waiter, "Would you like this on separate checks, or do you want it on one check?" Anna, "Yes." And there we go...

Veronica and I at Cafe Tazza: Veronica, "I would like something cold and chocolate."

Mom, Veronica and I at Villa Montez: Veronica, "He texted me and asked if I wanted to hang out today." Anna, "When it rains it pours! WOOOOO!"

Stef and I at Starbucks, "This is perfect! It even LOOKS Africa!"

Bets, Stef and I at BBQ: HYSTERICAL LAUGHING ... "They have this crazy wall that you can climb..."

Brian Brandt... someone who means SO much to me, preached on Sunday!! NOT NORMAL! (timely message for me, by the way. shocking)

The Noah Face, "Gooby's my friend." and "Pop goes the weasel!" and "You take care."

The Somonon (Solomon), "BOOBY!" and "Zeba" (wanting to watch the Zebra Video). and "Booby, run!"

Taco Bueno, I pull up to the drive-through speaker, roll down the window, and a red wasp the size of a BIRD flies into my face. I SCREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMM! and roll up the window. It flies away, Claire is crazy laughing and says, "You just screamed in the ear of whoever is working the window!" and I'm like "NO WAY! She hadn't greeted us yet..." and I roll down the window and ask, "Um, did I just scream in your ear?" And a girl leans in from the background and says, "THAT was ME." Apparently she had yanked the headphones off of her ear when I started screaming and relinquished window duty. Have to admit, I screamed for many a second. Poor thing.

Seriously SO many other 'sweets' of the weekend and it culminated with my being with Claire at McDonald's back in Austin on Sunday night. We walked to McDonald's and I was thinking, "I sure would love an icecream cone, but I don't need one and I'm not going to ask Claire for a dollar for one." Then Claire ordered and ordered a cone and said, "And you're going to eat it with me!" and I was like, "Thank you, God! I didn't even say anything!" then, we're waiting for our food and talking and the girl doing the ice cream cone turns around and she has TWO in her hands... ONE FOR ME!!!!!! I was like, "God, you are AWE-SOME!" I walked out of that McDonald's in GREAT triumph, icecream cone held just like Lady Liberty.

Perfect end to a fully providential weekend. Thank you sweet, sweet, sweet, Lord. Your love notes amaze me. You amaze me :)

For more pics of the boys head to my Facebook page. For a GREAT little clip, click below :)

I'm not gonna lie...

2008-07-21T17:47:00.001-07:00

I love me some American Gladiator!

A few fun things :)

2008-07-21T17:19:00.000-07:00

Soooooo ... VERY random, fun, wonderful things going on in these parts :) Wanted to share a bit with you.

1. I'm in HEB the other day with my hubs... we divided to conquer and while he's snagging fruit juice I realize they have 5 CHEWY COOKIES on sale for $1!! While I'm standing there, I look up to see my AMAZING husband walking up grinning with red roses! I squealed out loud (of course) and declared, "Roses AND cookies!?!" I can't even BELIEVE it! (okay, I just noticed that this pic of roses is when he brought home roses two weeks ago. Seriously, this guys is UN-believeable. But the HEB story is great too so I had to leave it :) ).

2. Basically, I was a professional baseball player today ... almost. I DID get to walk on a professional field and it was super cool. While the guys Betty Blake and I were with were talking about how they wished they'd brought a ball and gloves, all I could think about was a soccer ball on that amazing grass! Either way, super fun :)

3. The last pic is a sneak pic at a potential HUGE event... Yes. This is an official "teaser."

love to you all

Both sides ...

2008-07-18T11:27:00.000-07:00

Something that God has REALLY been impressing on my heart (and spoke DIRECTLY to me through someone else) is that in order to have consistent intimacy in my relationship with God (and truly in any relationship in general) I have to be honest in sharing both sides of the heart experience.

First Key: Actually bringing my heart to God. This is absolutely critical in having an intimate relationship with Him. I have to bring my heart to Him... and in bringing my heart, I have to bring ALL of my heart. Which is the 'second key.'

Second Key: Both expressing praise/thanksgiving/rejoicing about life and all that is happening, etc, etc and expressing despair/pain/confusion/frustration/anger in the same way. If I am only doing one of those, or am heavier in one than the other, I am going to be out of balance in my relationship with God and stifled in consistently feeling connected and intimate with Him. I was told that, “The American Church in general is great at the Praise Muscle, but needs to grow in the Lament Muscle.” I would venture to also say that a lot of people stuck in consistent heart pain who don’t feel connected/intimate with God anymore may be great at the Lament Muscle, but could use some work with the Praise Muscle.

For me, I need to grow in the Lament Muscle. I am NOT good at the expressing despair/anger/frustration to God. A book someone just told me about that I want to mention to you is, “A Sacred Sorrow: Reaching out to God in the Lost Language of Lament” by Michael Card (http://www.amazon.com/Sacred-Sorrow-Reaching-Language-Lament/dp/1576836673/ref=pd_bbs_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1216405304&sr=8-2). There is also an “Experience Guide” to help you start walking this out (http://www.amazon.com/Sacred-Sorrow-Experience-Guide-Reaching/dp/1576836681/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1216405304&sr=8-1). I don’t know which I’ll get yet, probably both :)

Anyways, one of the things we see in Psalms 91 is that God LONGS to show us that He IS our covering and our safe place, but our hearts have to come to Him in order for us to be confident of/feel His protection and covering. I think this is also confirmed in Psalms 107:13-16.

Anyhow, if you want to dig deeper, here are some passages to work through.
Jude 1:24; Psalms 107:13-16 (all of 107, really); Job 28:18; Psalms 34:18; Romans 8:26-39; John 16:7-15; Acts 17:24-28

Feel free to share your two cents… I’d love to hear it :O)

I’ll ‘end’ with a verse sweet Bets shared with me today, "And now to him who can keep you on your feet, standing tall in his bright presence, fresh and celebrating -to our one God, our only Savior, through Jesus Christ, our Master, be glory, majesty, strength, and rule before all time, and now, and to the end of all time. Amen! (Jude 1:24-25)

Helps?

2008-07-18T08:32:00.001-07:00

How do I 'subscribe' to friends' Blogs so that there will be a list on my profile?

What are 'team members'?

Thanks! :)

2, again :) Yeesh with the theme, here... NOT INTENTIONAL

2008-07-18T06:36:00.000-07:00

You guys are so fun! Thanks for the really warm welcome and encouragement :) So, a couple of questions have come up....

1. With the pics in my 'hello world' post where I'm so excited, Ryan planned this crazy awesome surprise birthday party for me last year and that was right when I walked into the room .... there were well over 40 people from all of the different areas of my life ... I just could not believe it!! SO GREAT THIS MAN!!! WEEEEEE!! :) ( i love how proud and happy Ryan looks in these pics ... it makes my heart warm :O) )

2. The name Grace Unveiled reflects who I am, and also who I want to be. So, I love, love, love this passage:

2 Corinthians 3:12-18
"12 Therefore, since we have such a hope, we are very bold. 13 We are not like Moses, who would put a veil over his face to keep the Israelites from gazing at it while the radiance was fading away. 14 But their minds were made dull, for to this day the same veil remains when the old covenant is read. It has not been removed, because only in Christ is it taken away. 15 Even to this day when Moses is read, a veil covers their hearts. 16 But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. 17 Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 18 And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."

My name means Grace and my greatest desire is that I would continue to walk in the freedom I've received by the grace of Jesus Christ and that His glory would continue to be reflected in me and that I would be un-veiled in that (free, not hidden)... Not only do I want to live in a way that is real and reflects what God has done in my heart and life, but this scripture says, "EVER-increasing glory"! That is an AMAZING thought and really excites me :)

Beautiful days to all of you :)

"The pressure of a name."

2008-07-17T17:36:00.000-07:00

OH MAN, this makes me laugh! I've just sat here for a good thirty minutes trying to come up with a name for my blog.... "Johnson & Johnson" being my first choice - taken. "How about God in real life?" Eh. Didn't do anything for me either... Starting this journey a bit ago I asked for God's help because I wanted the name to be great ... really capture who I am, what I want this to be about, etc. And then it came to me!!! Grace Unveiled 2! Why so perfect? Check this puppy out: http://www.graceunveiled.blogspot.com/. That was me 4 years ago almost to the month! Wild, huh? SOOOOOO funny that I had such great dreams of rants that would maybe give me enough accountability to actually take action. Instead, an empty blog. Can I promise better with this little guy? I hope so! I've been thinking about starting one for a while and tonight I hopped on the computer to download some pics and realized that it was "The Night." I had no idea :)

So here we are, Grace Unveiled 2. I put the 2 to signify a second try at a great name and a great dream... now I'm all warm fuzzy because I realized that Grace Unveiled is now 2 with the sweetest of Ryan Mckays. It blows my mind to think about all of the absolutely wild things that have happened since Grace Unveiled began. Funny that I didn't need to vomit out my crazy rants for God to take me on adventures I would have never imagined. I won't jump into all of that now, I will just say I'm glad to be back, and happy to be 2.